5 Things You Need To Let Him Know After You've Cheated

There are all kinds of things you'll wish you had said before your life is over. Make sure these five things you need to tell him after you've cheated on him are not among those things.

1.

I'm sorry. It won't make up for it. Nothing you say will. You need to let your husband know that you didn't mean to hurt him. That wasn't your intention when you cheated after all and it's one of those unintended consequences that happens when the other person finds out. Don't offer pity. That will only add insult to injury. Just let him know that his pain was not your goal and that you feel incredibly guilty that you hurt him, betrayed his trust, and are now causing him even more pain.
2.

Tell him the truth. It's the least you can do. There will be plenty of questions he's going to ask you. Even when the answers are difficult you owe it to him and the love you share to be honest with him when the time comes to give answers. There's no reason to be mean or overly harsh but honesty almost always pays. Don't cheapen your marriage by throwing it completely away by being dishonest in this time when you should be working to rebuild trust.
3.

Let him know it wasn't his fault. While the old "it's not you; it's me" line isn't what the doctor ordered you need to make sure that you acknowledge and he understands that he isn't to blame for your infidelity. You know right from wrong and you knew that this was not the right path to take. Now you're living with the consequences and regrets. Don't let him blame himself or dig down deep looking for what he did wrong when you were the one in the wrong. Give him that much dignity in this in the very least.


4.

Make sure he understands that this had nothing to do with love. Cheating isn't about how you feel about your husband. You didn't stop loving him in order to cheat though you might have tried in order to mentally justify it to yourself. Don't let him think that a light went off in your marriage and he just didn't see it. Not unless you are one of the rare exceptions and that is really what happened.
5.

Tell him where you'd like to go with your marriage from here. Again, be honest but you need to let him know what you want. Do you want to make things right? Are you hoping to end things with your husband to be with the other man? Have you simply decided that marriage isn't right for you right now? Whatever you've decided you owe it to him to tell him now rather than taking your time or avoiding an answer you either don’t want to deliver or you think he won't like to hear.