Why is it that some people tend to be more caring and compassionate than others? I'm finally beginning to realize that it has nothing to do with a person NOT caring about what's going on in a friend/family's life, but more to do with the fact that some people have a hard time putting their feelings into words, thus they say or do "nothing" when a friend really needs some COMPASSION. Or perhaps they feel if they get too involved with a person's situation, it brings them too close to the reality that life has its trials and tribulations and that life here on this earth is not forever, and they don't want to "go there."
Webster's Dictionary defines COMPASSION as sympathetic consciousness (or awareness) of others' distress together with a desire to alleviate it. So, being conscious of someone's distress or something they are going through is one thing, but having the desire to alleviate it brings it back to "what can you do" personally to make a difference.
I have discovered from my journey through life thus far that it is the experiences and challenges I have faced that have helped me become more compassionate toward others. When my younger brother was killed in a tragic farm accident at the age of 40, I was devastated. These were tragedies that happened to other people, not our family. After all, I prayed every night for God to keep my family safe. I finally had to let go and realize that my brother WAS safe - in God's heavenly realm, but no longer here on this earth with his family. He left behind a loving wife and 3 precious children, the youngest who was the same age (7) as our daughter at that time. My parents were devastated losing their only son, as well as my dad's business partner in farming and painting (they were great friends). People do not like to talk about death, but we all need to realize that death is part of life. We need to be doing every day the things that we feel led to do. Each day is a precious gift that we cannot have back. As hard as it may be, it's important that we reach out to others who need our support. The words, "I care about what you are going through" or, "I don't know how you feel personally but I do care about you," will show them they are not alone.
Previous to my brother's accident and death, I had lost my first roommate out of college from liver cancer. She was only 21 years old. Everything happened so fast...she was diagnosed and passed away within six weeks. I had a hard time understanding why someone so young and vibrant could be taken away so quickly. She left behind a little 5-year old sister who would really never know her. This was also hard for me to accept. These events did something to me personally; they made me want to reach out to others who were going through a similar situation. They could have made me bitter and turned me away from God and my faith, but I knew that more than ever I needed God in my life, and that I also wanted so deeply to be able to reach out to those in similar situations. By experiencing these situations, I was drawn more and more to those who also were experiencing them, wanting to do something to help. Sometimes the best thing we can do for someone who is facing a tragedy is simply to pray for him or her. God hears our every prayer and cares even more deeply than we do. There is a power through prayer that is greater than anything we can do or say.
Shortly after my brother's death, I became involved with a nonprofit organization called "Amanda the Panda" which a woman had founded to help siblings/parents/family of those who had lost loved ones. She used this ministry to reach out to others and I felt compelled to help spread the word about what her organization was doing. I made myself get out of my comfort zone and joined a committee which presented her nonprofit organization to companies in town, ASKING them for $ to provide a way for the employees of these companies to have a support system such as Amanda the Panda. I would never have done this if it hadn't been for the fact that I was myself hurting from the loss of my brother and wanted to DO SOMETHING that would make a difference for others - to teach others to show compassion. Was it easy for me to do this? No, but it was the beginning of me realizing that even as just one individual, I could make a difference in the lives of others. I didn't want others to hurt by themselves, but to feel as though someone cared.
A few years later, my dad had some serious health problems and needed several major surgeries including open heart surgery. My parents spent several weeks at our home after Dad's surgery recuperating from this. My dad faced so much adversity in his life; yet he taught me that there is always hope and we should never give up. He always looked for the positive.... when he was hospitalized, he would spend time chatting with everyone at the hospital, not just the physicians and nurses, but also the housekeepers and maintenance workers. He treated everyone the same and I saw in him a deep compassion and love for all people; this compassion towards others drew others to him. This is how I wanted to be as well. He taught me that, despite any trial in life, there is always hope. One of the greatest compliments he gave me was telling me how he appreciated what I was doing to help him and my mom and how wonderful it was to have me for a "friend" as well as daughter. I'll never forget the emotion in that moment.
To help you start (or go forward) in your journey of nurturing relationships and showing more compassion, I'd love for you to join me in making a difference today by doing something which allows you to reach out to someone who needs a little compassion in his/her life. It might be an elderly person who rarely gets mail or maybe needs some specific encouragement. It might be a college student who needs some encouragement and support from a parent/grandparent, friend. Perhaps it's a service man or woman who is serving our country so that we can have the freedoms we so easily take for granted, while he/she and their family make this tremendous sacrifice for us. Perhaps it is someone who has lost a loved one and just needs to know that someone cares what they are going through. Whoever it may be, please take the time right now to reach out to that person who comes to mind....send them a note of love and encouragement; pick up the phone and call them, or simply say a prayer on their behalf. You CAN make a difference. I have a feeling when you start reaching out in this way, you may not be able to stop! Here's to COMPASSION and sharing it!
Webster's Dictionary defines COMPASSION as sympathetic consciousness (or awareness) of others' distress together with a desire to alleviate it. So, being conscious of someone's distress or something they are going through is one thing, but having the desire to alleviate it brings it back to "what can you do" personally to make a difference.
I have discovered from my journey through life thus far that it is the experiences and challenges I have faced that have helped me become more compassionate toward others. When my younger brother was killed in a tragic farm accident at the age of 40, I was devastated. These were tragedies that happened to other people, not our family. After all, I prayed every night for God to keep my family safe. I finally had to let go and realize that my brother WAS safe - in God's heavenly realm, but no longer here on this earth with his family. He left behind a loving wife and 3 precious children, the youngest who was the same age (7) as our daughter at that time. My parents were devastated losing their only son, as well as my dad's business partner in farming and painting (they were great friends). People do not like to talk about death, but we all need to realize that death is part of life. We need to be doing every day the things that we feel led to do. Each day is a precious gift that we cannot have back. As hard as it may be, it's important that we reach out to others who need our support. The words, "I care about what you are going through" or, "I don't know how you feel personally but I do care about you," will show them they are not alone.
Previous to my brother's accident and death, I had lost my first roommate out of college from liver cancer. She was only 21 years old. Everything happened so fast...she was diagnosed and passed away within six weeks. I had a hard time understanding why someone so young and vibrant could be taken away so quickly. She left behind a little 5-year old sister who would really never know her. This was also hard for me to accept. These events did something to me personally; they made me want to reach out to others who were going through a similar situation. They could have made me bitter and turned me away from God and my faith, but I knew that more than ever I needed God in my life, and that I also wanted so deeply to be able to reach out to those in similar situations. By experiencing these situations, I was drawn more and more to those who also were experiencing them, wanting to do something to help. Sometimes the best thing we can do for someone who is facing a tragedy is simply to pray for him or her. God hears our every prayer and cares even more deeply than we do. There is a power through prayer that is greater than anything we can do or say.
Shortly after my brother's death, I became involved with a nonprofit organization called "Amanda the Panda" which a woman had founded to help siblings/parents/family of those who had lost loved ones. She used this ministry to reach out to others and I felt compelled to help spread the word about what her organization was doing. I made myself get out of my comfort zone and joined a committee which presented her nonprofit organization to companies in town, ASKING them for $ to provide a way for the employees of these companies to have a support system such as Amanda the Panda. I would never have done this if it hadn't been for the fact that I was myself hurting from the loss of my brother and wanted to DO SOMETHING that would make a difference for others - to teach others to show compassion. Was it easy for me to do this? No, but it was the beginning of me realizing that even as just one individual, I could make a difference in the lives of others. I didn't want others to hurt by themselves, but to feel as though someone cared.
A few years later, my dad had some serious health problems and needed several major surgeries including open heart surgery. My parents spent several weeks at our home after Dad's surgery recuperating from this. My dad faced so much adversity in his life; yet he taught me that there is always hope and we should never give up. He always looked for the positive.... when he was hospitalized, he would spend time chatting with everyone at the hospital, not just the physicians and nurses, but also the housekeepers and maintenance workers. He treated everyone the same and I saw in him a deep compassion and love for all people; this compassion towards others drew others to him. This is how I wanted to be as well. He taught me that, despite any trial in life, there is always hope. One of the greatest compliments he gave me was telling me how he appreciated what I was doing to help him and my mom and how wonderful it was to have me for a "friend" as well as daughter. I'll never forget the emotion in that moment.
To help you start (or go forward) in your journey of nurturing relationships and showing more compassion, I'd love for you to join me in making a difference today by doing something which allows you to reach out to someone who needs a little compassion in his/her life. It might be an elderly person who rarely gets mail or maybe needs some specific encouragement. It might be a college student who needs some encouragement and support from a parent/grandparent, friend. Perhaps it's a service man or woman who is serving our country so that we can have the freedoms we so easily take for granted, while he/she and their family make this tremendous sacrifice for us. Perhaps it is someone who has lost a loved one and just needs to know that someone cares what they are going through. Whoever it may be, please take the time right now to reach out to that person who comes to mind....send them a note of love and encouragement; pick up the phone and call them, or simply say a prayer on their behalf. You CAN make a difference. I have a feeling when you start reaching out in this way, you may not be able to stop! Here's to COMPASSION and sharing it!
No comments:
Post a Comment